more random stuff... for those who might be feeling stressed :)

Fred & Mary

Fred and Mary got married but can't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's Mom and Dad's for their first night together. In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and MaryAre up yet. She replies, "No". Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think?" His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school." Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" She replies, "No." Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?" His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school." After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" His mom says, "No." He asks, "Do you know what I think?" His mom replies, "Ok, now tell me what you think?" He says: "Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue."


now... something more meaningful to think about...
THE SPOONS A holy man was having a conversation with the God one day and said, "Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like. "GOD led the holy man to these two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water. The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful, but because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering. Then GOD said, "You have seen Hell."

They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking. The holy man said, "I don't understand. "It is simple" said GOD, "it requires but one skill. You see, they have learned to feed each other. While the greedy think only of themselves.

"A friend is someone who reaches for your hand, and touches your heart." "People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don't need to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there." "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

JamJosh :)